Truth, Love and a little Malice
Monday, 1 October 2012
For me, the most daunting part about blogging is what and how much to reveal about myself. If I am assertive about my liberal stand and candid about my daily lifestyle, I would run the risk of attacks by friends, occasional readers and may be psychopathic stalkers, I value. But if I am less so, the blog loses the edgy, honest and voyeuristic sparkle that are some ingredients of good blogging, so we have been told by gurus. Besides, what is the point of voicing my thoughts if I have to soften them? But any careless decision can result in dire consequences. Labels: Bloggers, Blogging, Blogs, Blogsphere
posted by S A J Shirazi @ Monday, October 01, 2012,
37 Comments:
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At 14:24,
echa said...
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my blog is not private at all. For me, private blog is a blog that has a password's protect, if i want to blog privately, WP has ability to make one post password's protect. But I don't write as if I am talking to my best friends, I write as if I am imagining something. My secret? my hide? as I say that my blog is not private, I don't find a need to tell my personal secret that stranger may read. If my blog is private, I should have not published it, that's all.
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At 16:42,
Hammad said...
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nops not at all, my blog isnt private. Indeed I made it for sharing some gud humor but even now didnt met the right public but its a work you cant give up so early, for the secrets? I have an offline paper-based diary without any password, without any restrictions, everyone can read it in my home but
cant understand it as the whole diary is encrypted in my self-made language. Lastly, net is not such a place to share your private-stuff, coz it smells so phishy....u cant trust on! -
At 17:34,
dbdoberman said...
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my blog started out private, as you know. It would have been alot more revealing if it was, I am sure. I don't have to make up anything, either folks like my posts, or they find it boring. I do use humour alot, who doesn't need a good laugh.
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At 19:06,
Sarah said...
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I am very open in my blog, as you know.
These are all things i'm thinking about at the moment. What I really want to know is how many people keep blogs which people in their 'real' life dont know about.
Sometimes I feel that I shot myself in the foot when I really want to write about something weighing on my mind, but can't because people from all over the place read it. But, for the most part, I'm glad it's not private. -
At 09:49,
Houston said...
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I understand completely the several points you made in your post. My blogging personna is an enhanced version of my personal and private life. I actually have four different blogs by which I relate to a number of different communities of interest.
Dancing with Myself is my primary pesonality. Houston was a childhood nickname that I started using in order to keep people from looking up my home address and phone number. If one were determined, one could uncover my true identity. Also, I work in a very high profile setting, and I don't want my employer worrying about me divulging state secrets. You'll notice I seldom post on the subject of work or California state politics.
My other issue is my tribal identity. My mother's people belong to an isolated multi-racial group in rural Louisiana. I choose not to live there because of the fundamentalism of their beliefs. Most of my tribesmen disapprove of my urban lifestyle. On the other hand, I am a honored member of an important family in my clan, so they must defer to me on many issues. I used to hide my urban personality from them because I didn't want them distracted by details not important to the subject at hand. This year I discovered a large group of them were gossiping behind my back, so I became much more open about who I am and what I really think. Not everyone is happy. On the other hand, I am much happier. -
At 17:03,
Paul said...
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The blog is the thing !!
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At 01:02,
Chicka * Cosmo said...
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my blog started private. I saved all my posts as "drafts"... I changed the names of my friends and the ppl I talk about on the blog and made it public.
there are still a few things in draft-I would not dare makes those public!
I kept journals all my life & thats the same way I blog.
There are times I go into deep details, other times I dont. -
At 01:00,
Jim Donahue said...
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I started out listing my name as "Jim D." when I began blogging. After about eight months, I decided to use my full name.
But that said, my blog is rarely personal. Confessional or deeply personal blogs make me uncomfortable--especially when they criticize other people in an identifiable way. -
At 12:25,
'ka said...
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my blog is published on the internet, accessed by the entire world. so i know it won't be private. the off-limit stories are kept off-line :)
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At 08:44,
amy said...
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I pretty much am an open book. It is afterall my personal diary. I dont even print my deepest darkest secrets ANYWHERE. Those are just between God and I.... but for the most part, I am who I am online and am the same person face to face.
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At 17:19,
Anne said...
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Where there is little truth, there is little point. At least for me. Found you at Brian's!
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At 10:42,
seeingdouble said...
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I'm pretty honest (read: mouthy) in real life, and my blog is no different. I probably should censor myself more than I do, but I haven't mastered knowing when to shut my mouth in person, and it's so much harder online!!
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At 14:44,
H.A. said...
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I try my hardest to restrain myself...it's no use. And besides, I don't see any point in artificial blogging, if u know what I mean. If my blog's not me, then what's the point, scribbling in it day after day?
But sometimes I do feel extremely paranoid - which leads to measures like deleting whole paragraphs or blog entries:) -
At 19:48,
Syed Sibgatullah said...
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if you aren't reflected in your blog, it's really no blog and there's no point in maintaining such a journal. and if there were to be any info that you wouldn't want the world to be peeping at, why bother putting it up for the public?
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At 20:49,
Sidhusaaheb said...
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I think that a blog has to be written honestly.
If you think you are likely to draw strong reactions, at times, you can always choose to moderate comments before publishing. -
At 21:07,
EXSENO said...
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Shirazi,
Personally I have never made up anything about myself, so anything perosnal that I have written in the past has been true.
But since my family and friends know about my blog I try hard not to step on anyones toes.
I really wish that no personal family or friends had found out about my blog but since they did and do I feel limited in some things, but then again that might be for the best. Somtimes it's best to not reveal to much.
I think this is something that each person has to decide for theirself. It's a very personal decision that one must think over very carefully. Knowing some personal things about a blogger can be helpful to the people reading the blog, it may help them to identify and connect better. But then where to draw the line is still another decision one must make. Sometime less is more. -
At 23:00,
Irving said...
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A very good question :) The Davish blog was started to express what I loved about the Sufi path, to share stories and thoughts, and some excerpts from my novel, Master of the Jinn. I try not to write about myself, for that is nothing.
Ya Haqq! -
At 00:19,
Trailady said...
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I think it is always best to be real. :o)
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At 02:24,
Marz said...
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I think a lot of the other commenters have said the same thing: keep things real. I believe that a blog becomes 'yours' when there is a strong sense of yourself reflected in the pages. Making things up defeats that.
In my blog, I have no problem with showing who I am, but I do not showcase every single part of me.. I don't even think what I write on my blog is even half of who I am. All the entries that I post on my blog are 100% true (with exception to the times where I just want to exercise my writing skills by writing stories because prose is something I enjoy). After all.. it is a outlet of the goings on in my life and in my head. If there is a certain part of me that I don't want the readers to know, I keep it away from my blog. I don't justify the reason why, I just don't mention it. After all, it's not 'exactly' lying when you mention it.. or something.
PS. There is nothing wrong with being liberal. I am a liberal. If people have problems with you being in any way liberal, it is their loss, their issues, and their misgivings.. not yours.
(Btw, I liked the way you put blogging having a 'voyeuristic sparkle'.. well put!) -
At 03:47,
Penny Halston said...
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Most of my family and friends know my URL, but they seldom read it. At first I was sorry that I revealed my site to them but now I am glad. It keeps me from writing something that I might regret. I use a fake name because I don't want my work aware of my blog. I have an unusual name that would be easy to identify.
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At 10:54,
Naomi said...
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Hmmmm. This post poses an excellent question.
I make a point to not get too personal on my professional blog, but I think my sense of humor and fondness of other bloggers comes through.
Recently, I started a journal to give me an outlet for my personal thoughts. I'm still a little reserved there. In time, perhaps my readers will experience the hilarious side of me. :) -
At 11:00,
Deb S. said...
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Since my blog is directed at professional colleagues, I don't get too cute with my posts. But I do think it's OK to let some of my personality shine through, especially in comments.
Good topic. -
At 16:33,
Teresa said...
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I don't share anything that I would feel comfortable with the whole world knowing--because that is the risk that is out there. And, I always tell the truth. I just might tell the whole truth. I am very protective of my sons.
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At 23:32,
Syed Sibgatullah said...
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I think that blogging is about sharing and saying things that you truly believe in. Like regarding revealing too much in a blog, it's always a matter of personal choice. But, keeping in view what I say in my weblog, the more you try to put your beliefs and your feelings, the more the quality improves. And anyways, a blog is supposed to be a space where you rant about stuff in a way you most probably would not want to say to people in real life. I mean, a weblog is more blunt and direct in putting across ideas than a real life interaction with other human beings.
But yes, there would be some instances where you wouldn't want to reveal much in a blog. I think this should only pertain to personal life. If a blog post relates to personal matters, it shouldn't be forming a part of the public domain, unless the details are general enough. But then there do occur instances when there is an overwhelming impact of, in the absence of a better word, emotions to just say things out. Such an act is again a result of the relative ease that a blog provides you for revealing your true self. -
At 23:34,
Syed Sibgatullah said...
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And thanks for visiting, Shirazi.
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At 05:38,
Fletch said...
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As much as I "hide" behind a shortened version of my surname, I really don't try to hide my identity from anyone. The biggest apprehension I have had is in revealing my blog to the people close to me.
I believe that blogging is an exchage of ideas, experiences, opinions and information and should be "censored" as little as possible. -
At 21:34,
(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...
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very interesting questions posed. But, do we all talk about our personal lives in the blogs? Or do we have to? It is true that every writer puts some part of himself in writing a post or an article but its not necessary that everything we write is about our lives. I know a lot of bloggers who really don't.
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At 05:42,
Id it is said...
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My blog is a collection of my ponderings over and at times spontaneous outpourings on subjects, novels, films etc that I happen to have either consciously picked or else happen to have come upon. It is seldom that I muse over the fact that my writings may have an audience, and that they may or may not see it my way. I guess that is perhaps how a blogger differs from a journalist or a litterateur of any sort; there is an absence of conscious acc ountability.
A very thought-provoking post. -
At 05:42,
Id it is said...
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This comment has been removed by the author.
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At 04:51,
irving said...
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Mine is a Sufi blog, so I don't intrude with myself. Besides, we all have variations of the same story.
Ya Haqq! -
At 19:44,
Malaika said...
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my blog is usually about general things that i find out about on the internet or hear about...so my blog is not private at all but its fun reading private blogs you get to learn so much about a person...
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At 13:49,
Kausar Bilal said...
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A very thought provoking article and voice of many bloggers...We all have these conflicts and demons...I believe as bloggers we all try to be as much ourselves as we can...but yes there are restrictions...
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At 19:51,
Saima Ashraf said...
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Really it turns very hard when we blog here though it be on any subject. Mine is on dogs but I have to fight against many restrictions on it due to many reasons. Earning through a blog is a hard nut to crack.
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At 19:51,
Saima Ashraf said...
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Really it turns very hard when we blog here though it be on any subject. Mine is on dogs but I have to fight against many restrictions on it due to many reasons. Earning through a blog is a hard nut to crack.
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At 19:55,
Saima Ashraf said...
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Not to talk of myself, I cannot talk on the dogs as I want. Freedom of writing and the limitations on the neck of freedom are two opposite poles. We just cannot what we want to say.
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At 11:43,
said...
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I have a good friend,still single at age 55, who intends to look for a girlfriend. I am wondering whether to consider him as lucky or not lucky for never ever fallen in love before. He is perfectly a normal healthy man who is responsible and committed to his legal employment. Perhaps he was too busy, first to take care of both his elderly parents who had lately passed away, and later making sure that his younger brothers and sisters are all settled down in their lives. All his responsibilities and obligations as the eldest in the family are fully cleared by now, and with some hard saving through the many years, he is seriously wanting to get an ideal woman to love and eventually marry her too.
The good friend seek my advices. He is pondering whether to befriend young lady below age 25 or to look for much older woman!!! Not forgetting he is already touching 55 today.
Mmmmm!!! Tough question to me!!! Using my personal observation in the romance world, I offer my view to my inexperience friend who is looking for a love mate . Younger ladies are usually beautiful and sexy to admire. They are always pleasant to look at, especially by the older men. BUT! Their understanding of life is definitely shallow and weak being that they are still young in age. With little experience in loving someone, they might not truly understand the real sense of this word, LOVE. Whereas much older women, who could be a divorcee or a widow is more realistic. A divorcee and a widow have the experience of being loved, understand the feeling of what is love. With their relationship of the past, they might appreciate the present if another acceptable man comes around again. A good relationship between a man and a woman, requires a lot of understanding. Both have to be tolerance and be patience with one another. Yes! If you pick a young lady who could capture your attention with her external beauty, but most likely she might not have the patience and tolerance for a much older man. Is only the beauty for the eyes but plenty of stress and tension for his mind later. Be practical my friend. Though a divorcee or a widow might not have a wonderful past, they make a better choice if another opportunity is given to them.
A good piece of advice for my friend - "The beauty of a woman isn't judged by the way she combs her hair or how she dresses herself. The beauty of a woman is shown in her heart where love resides".
What do you say on this? -
At 11:55,
Sajini Chandrasekera said...
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Blog is my place of expressing my own feelings. It may be my own experience or some one else, but the bottom line is to write things people like to read and want to read. In my blog people share their stories and enjoy what i write. I keep a good blog and in the same way market it.
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